A DAY IN THE LIFE OF A CONCIERGE ...

                             

Last time I was in Berlin, the concierge at my hotel pulled off what seemed like a minor miracle.  He was able to book me on a flight that was already fully booked.  Today I overheard this same man, Torsten, effortlessly save the day for someone else.  His phone conversation went something like this:

"Hello, sir, your tickets to the Ballet are here.  I'm sure you will have a wonderful time ...  It's the best ballet company in Europe."  Pause.  "What's that?  I'm sorry, didn't you request tickets to the ballet this morning?"  Pause.  "I see. No, not at all, it can be arranged.  I will call you right back."  Pause, as Torsten dials another call, shouts in rapid German, hangs up, takes a deep breath and dials again.  "Hello sir, so sorry for the misunderstanding, I've fixed everything.  No more Ballet Dancing.  You have reservations at 8:30 to see some Belly Dancing ...Yes, I assure you, it's all quite authentic ...!"

 

ONE BIG MESSE ...!

                             

The "Messe" in Berlin is the name for what they call the "Fairground," which is where big trade shows take place.  Actually, "big" is an understatement.  I'm in town for a show called IFA which is the world's largest consumer electronics/home entertainment show.  It is so big that each "booth" can occupy an entire building and getting from place to place can be a nightmare.  I spent most of today rushing from meeting to meeting from 8:00 a.m. to nearly midnight and the show hasn't even started yet.  Oh, well.  I guess they don't call it "the Messe" for nothing ...!

LOBBYING FOR LOBSTER ...!

    

The Starbucks in Berlin stands vindicated after I "raked them over the coals" yesterday for their lack of Triple Berry Cobbler Muffins.  To my horror, a Barista Berliner called my bluff this morning by smiling and offering me a freshly baked Very Berry Muffin.  "Good Lord, no," I replied.  "Those things are putrid.  They leave an indelible stain on your fingers."  No doubt I'll be thrown out of the country by tomorrow.  Meanwhile, seafood appears to be on the menu today at 7th and Montana as Genevieve reports that a young girl arrived on the scene with a giant, inflatable Lobster.  Perhaps on my next trip to the Starbucks near Potsdamer Platz I'll ask for a Fresh Lobster Dinner just to see how they react ...!     

THE BERLIN WALLS ...!

      

I'm back in Berlin this week on business and, no sooner did I arrive, than I hit the proverbial wall.  My hotel, the Ritz-Carlton, is right near the site of the Berlin Wall at Potsdamer Platz, where they keep original pieces of the Wall on display for tourists.  I discovered a wall of another kind, however, at the Starbucks around the corner when I tried to place my usual order.  "I'll have a Grande Half Caff," I said cheerfully to the German Barista behind the counter.  I might as well have been talking to a Brick Wall.  "We don't offer half caffs here because we don't brew decaff," she said, coldly.  "In that case, I'll have a Grande Drip," I replied and then, to get her goat, I asked if she wouldn't mind baking me one of Starbucks' Famous Triple Berry Cobbler Muffins.  "I can't imagine why you don't serve them here," I said, "They're making such an indelible impression in the States ...!"

METAL ALLERGY AT 7TH AND SAN VICENTE ...!

                             

A team of builders is putting the pedal to the metal today -- in more ways than one -- as progress continues on the Monstrosity Under Construction at 7th and San Vicente.  In a new development, the upper story of the home, known among insiders as "Casa del Bozo," has been encased in a thin layer of metallic sheets that seem rusted to perfection.  "I've never seen anything like it," said one real estate executive.  "I'd call the look Mottled Metal."  Experts predict that the rest of the house -- from the walls that curve like funhouse mirrors to the strange appendages hanging over the doorway -- will be covered in Stucco.  The only good news is that the infamous "Stairway to Nowhere" now leads to a rooftop observation deck.  Unfortunately, it will offer a panoramic view of my bedroom ...! 

HOLLYWOOD HAPPENINGS AT 7TH AND MONTANA ...!

      

It was a weekend of Hollywood Happenings at 7th and Montana as two of our own made waves in Tinseltown.  Leslie's latest documentary -- The Pixar Story -- is getting good reviews and generating positive buzz among the Top Brass at Disney.  Meanwhile, speaking of "brassy," another local -- "Mr. Agent" -- made headlines yesterday by sending a controversial "farewell" e-mail after leaving his job at The William Morris Agency.  In his e-mail, which spread like wildfire throughout the industry, "Mr. Agent" pokes fun at some of Hollywood's biggest movers and shakers, a stunt which landed him both in the Hollywood Doghouse and in yesterday's Los Angeles Times.  I don't know "Mr. Agent" personally -- he usually keeps to himself quietly reading the newspaper -- but, to paraphrase Julia Phillips, something tells me he'll never eat lunch in this town, again ...!

MING THE MERCILESS AT 7TH AND MONTANA ...!

                             

Ear-piercing screams filled the air this morning at 7th and Montana as a newborn infant cried out, repeatedly, in what sounded like shock or terror.  "What's he doing to that baby?," I wondered as the father tried, unsuccessfully, to calm the infant down.  Indeed, the more he tried, the more she screamed.  Then, again, you'd probably scream, too, if your father resembled a stunt-double for Ming the Merciless, complete with a sinister beard twisted into dreadlocks and a pair of dark sunglasses worthy of the "Men in Black."