I ALWAYS PREFERRED "BREAD," ANYWAY ...!

                             

I spent my last day in Stockholm on a mission.  My assignment was to quietly locate and photograph Benny Andersson, the owner of the hotel I was staying at in Stockholm, the Rival, and a former member of the '70s pop group ABBA.  While, admittedly, I wouldn't know Benny if he fell out of one of the Eucalyptus Trees at 7th and Montana and started belting out tunes, THE NAME OF THE GAME as far as I was concerned was to get a candid photo of him for my blog, preferably doing Something Nutty.  I began my quest at the Front Desk.  "Tell me," I said in a conspiratorial whisper, "Does Benny ever hang around the hotel?"  "Oh yes," came the reply from the Front Desk Manager, "He stops by occasionally.  He loves the bread from our bakery."  I quickly ran upstairs to the restaurant.  "I hear Benny loves your bread," I said to one of the waiters, "Does he ever eat here?"  "Yes, indeed," said the waiter, "That's his table over there in the corner."  I grabbed a strategically placed table nearby, ordered dinner and bided my time.  No luck.  I knew if I hoped to get a candid shot of Benny, I'd have to TAKE A CHANCE on a more desperate approach.  I grabbed a basket of bread from the bakery, sat in the lobby bar and began whistling ABBA tunes until I thought the bartender would send out an S.O.S.  "This is the life," I said loudly, "Delicious bread, great music and a top-notch hotel ... I tell you, that Benny Andersson is a genius.  A pure genius."  Still, nothing.  MAMMA MIA!  I made a fool of myself and all to no avail.  Mark my words, Benny Andersson, one day I'll get a candid photo of you doing Something Nutty for my blog if it's the last thing I DO (I DO, I DO, I DO, I DO, I DO) ...!

SWEDE SENSATIONS ...

It was a picture perfect day in Stockholm today, ideal for exploring the nooks and crannies of this fascinating city.  I started by hiring a Tour Guide to show me around Gamla Stan, the Old Town dating back to the 13th Century.  Jenny, my guide, was an expert on the history of Stockholm and didn't mind telling me where all the skeletons are buried.  Take Christian the Tyrant, for example.  In 1520, he took over Sweden and -- with the help of a band of mercenaries -- set-up shop in the Royal Palace at Gamla Stan.  He threw a party shortly after taking over and, of course, invited all of his former opposition.  Midway through the festivities, he locked the doors, dragged off his guests and had them all executed in the City Center, at what is now the site of the Nobel Museum.  Some "Peace Prize," eh?  Then there's the "Mysterious Rabbit Square."  Nearly 200 years ago, a popular restaurant in Gamla Stan specialized in Rabbit Stew, a dish with a taste so rare it attracted a cult-like, international following.  One day, however, an expert arrived on the scene and declared "This is not rabbit!"  Closer inspection revealed that the restaurant had been serving-up Cat Meat for years.  Locals were so shocked, they burned the restaurant to the ground.  Today, the site is one of the few quiet courtyards in Gamla Stan, an ideal spot to read under the shade of an Oak Tree that stands where diners once enjoyed their "Fancy Feast."  From Gamla Stan, I made my way to the Vasa, a warship with an Ignominious History.  Built by King Gustavus Adolphus in 1628 as a spare-no-expense statement of Swedish Naval Supremacy, the Vasa sank in front of an audience of horrified spectators mere minutes into its Maiden Voyage.  It was raised nearly intact in 1961 and today can be found in a Museum on the Island of Djurgarden.  Of course, throughout the day I've been mindful of a Special Request from "Garnett109," who posted a comment yesterday urging me to "send pictures of the Buxom Blondes."  Inside Sources suggested I check-out an Intimate Little Establishment called "Marvelous Meduza and Friends" but, alas, it was closed on Sunday ...!    

I'LL TAKE SWEDEN ...!

A funny thing happened yesterday:  I woke up with a start and suddenly realized that I'd never been to Sweden.  Call it a case of Stockholm Syndrome, but I felt strangely compelled to visit a city where the sun rises at 3:00 a.m. and sets at 10:00 p.m.  And so, here I am in Stockholm, a beautiful city dating back to the 13th Century, where the old and the new blend as seamlessly as the Baltic Sea and Lake Malaren.  Stockholm is actually a series of 14 small islands, each with its own personality.  I explored most of them today on foot and by boat and it was exhilarating.  The Swedes love nature and have gone to great lengths over the centuries to keep Stockholm filled with green spaces like the Royal Park of Djurgarden, a former royal hunting preserve, and the Skansen, an "outdoor museum" featuring Swedish architecture through the ages.  The only thing I didn't experience today was the world famous Smorgasbord at the Grand Hotel.  I checked it out briefly -- long enough to see that it was basically a High-End, All-You-Can-Eat Feeding Trough -- and took a pass.  "Will you be joining us?," asked the Maitre 'd.  "I'm afraid not," I replied, "But I must say this is the largest and most impressive Smorgasbord I've ever seen ... everyone seems to be enjoying it immensely."  Frankly, judging from the looks of some of their patrons, I think they should consider moving the whole thing from the "Veranda" to the "Rotunda."  Meanwhile, as for me, I'm staying at the Hotel Rival, a boutique hotel on the Mariatorget owned by Benny Andersson of ABBA fame.  My goal for tomorrow is to get a candid photo of Benny when he least expects it ...! 

FOWL PLAY ...

    

In response to my post yesterday, Beckie raised an important question about Eindhoven City Center:  "Where are the pigeons?," she asked, "In Britain there would be pigeons everywhere ... Under chairs, tables, on people's heads.  Do they have pigeons there?"  Just to set the record straight, there are plenty of pigeons in Eindhoven but they seem to focus their energies on a single target:  The statue of Frits Philips that stands in the center of town.  In any case, it's not the pigeons you need to worry about in Eindhoven.  I was sitting in an outdoor area near our office this afternoon when one of my colleagues gestured towards a group of large, white birds floating in a man-made lake behind me.  "Those are Water Chickens," he said, "They can be rather aggressive ...!"

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PANCAKES IN EINDHOVEN ...

                                 

I woke up this morning in Eindhoven -- the industrial heart of the Netherlands -- hungry for new experiences.  You see, whenever I visit Eindhoven -- and I come here a lot -- I stay in the same hotels, eat in the same restaurants, meet with the same people and work in the same offices.  It's high time, I decided, to break the mold, starting with breakfast.  For years, I've noticed what can only be described as the Dutch version of a Pancake House -- a restaurant simply called "The Pancake" -- right near the City Center.  I made a beeline there this morning, only to discover that it wasn't open for breakfast.  What next, a "Coffee House" that doesn't serve Coffee ...?!?

STARBUCKS IN AMSTERDAM ...

                             

There's only one Starbucks in Amsterdam but, not to worry, I found it.  O.K., I'll admit it, I already knew where it was and I made a beeline for it shortly after my flight landed yesterday afternoon.  You see, the only Starbucks around here is at the airport.  The Dutch aren't so into Starbucks.  Why?  For one thing, their own coffee is very good.  For another, no self-respecting Dutchman would fritter away 10 Euros for a cup of coffee and a piece of pastry ...!

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UNITED WE STAND AND STAND ... AND STAND ...

  

It was a case of "United we Stand" at the Los Angeles International Airport this morning as dozens of people stood for ages in a seemingly endless line to board United Flight #946 to Amsterdam.  The flight, you see, had "mechanical difficulties."  I wouldn't have minded waiting if I hadn't been sandwiched between the Travelers from Hell.  In front of me was the Swiss Family Obnoxious, a family of six who seemed to take great pleasure in cutting in front of me in line by ducking under a cordoned area.  "Mommy," said one of the little girls very loudly, "We just cut in front of that man."  "Shut up!," replied the mother (pictured above), "Do you want him to hear you?!?"  At this point, the man standing behind me in line -- an elfin creature with a mischievous grin -- tapped me on the shoulder.  "They say the plane has a mechanical problem," he said, "Of course, I know all about mechanical difficulties ... Airline Disasters are my business!"  "You don't say," I replied, "Are you traveling on business or pleasure?!?"  "Alas," he chuckled, "Duty calls."  "I know the feeling," I said, "If you'll excuse me, I need to check-in with the office."  And with that, I ran as fast as my legs would carry me to the nearest airport lounge and rebooked myself on another flight.  Last time I checked, "Mr. Disaster" was still regaling the crowd with details of Eastern Air Lines Flight 401 which crashed in the Florida Everglades in 1972, and the Swiss Family Obnoxious was busy staging a Family Feud ...

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