GOODBYE TABLE HOGS ... AT 7TH AND MONTANA!

The Table Hogs -- a group that descends on Our Favorite Starbucks every weekend and takes up two tables and nearly every available chair in the place -- made the scene yesterday.  Thank God there's an app for that!

THE SOUND OF MUSIC ... AT 7TH AND MONTANA!

Ladies and Gentlemen, meet Mr. and Mrs. Quilty, a delightful couple who made the scene at 7th and Montana this week wearing matching vests that looked they were made out of a quilt that time forgot.  They were purple with swirling, pink peacock feathers.  "Joseph called," I said, "He wants his amazing, technicolor dreamcoat back!"  But they were too busy strutting their stuff to notice.  Some say they're just a pair of unfortunate fashion victims, but I think they've fallen into a terrible Von Trapp.  It starts small, with little things like doilies and quilts and, before you know it, they'll be fashioning play clothes out of curtains and dangling from the Eucalyptus Trees on 7th Street ...

KRIS KRINGEWORTHY ... AT 7TH AND MONTANA!

Stomachs were turning at 7th and Montana yesterday as a would be Kris Kringle made the scene spreading his own brand of holiday cheer.  He whipped out his cell phone and began working his way through his Little Black Book, loudly impersonating Santa all the way.  "HO, HO, HO TO YOU, SUGAR, HAVE YOU BEEN NAUGHTY OR NICE?," he bellowed.  No one seemed to stay on the line with him for very long.  "All I want for Christmas is a good set of ear plugs," I sighed.  Some say he was just being 'sociable,' but I think he must have been dropped on his Egg Noggin as a child ...

A DOG'S LIFE ... AT 7TH AND MONTANA!

It was a dog day afternoon at 7th and Montana on Saturday and if you don't believe me, just ask 'Neighbor A,' who made the scene intent on proving that the bakeries in our neighborhood are going to the dogs.  First, he complained about the declining quality of the Danish and Croissants at the Fancy Schmancy Café nearby.  Then, as if to perform a taste test, he reached for a bag of Dog Treats.  "Those truffles look delicious," he said, pointing at a plastic bag of Kibble, "May I?"  "Help yourself," said Richard.  Truth be told, we're not talking about any ordinary Kibble here.  It was a special recipe designed to prevent Reggie, the Polish Lowland Sheepdog, from getting diarrhea.  But that didn't stop Neighbor A.  He pulled a nugget out of the bag, popped it into his mouth and licked his lips with delight.  The whole thing makes me wonder ... what does he do when he sees a fire hydrant?!?

AMSTERDAM ...

I've been in Amsterdam all week and -- while the Starbucks around here isn't as interesting as 7th and Montana -- it's been a busy week, filled with meetings, meetings and more meetings.  There have been some highlights:  One of my colleagues designed all new lighting throughout the Rijksmuseum, the famous museum known especially for its Rembrandt collection, and he gave me a special tour emphasizing how the new lighting has brought the museum's collection to life.  Here's an overview:  Rijksmuseum Lighting.  Coverage of 7th and Montana will resume when I return.

A CLOSE SHAVE ... AT 7TH AND MONTANA!

7th and Montana was buzzing this morning ... but it wasn't the crowd.  An Anonymous Newcomer made the scene, intent on demonstrating the fine art of shaving.  He took a seat at the bus stop, adjusted the paisley brim of his cap and whipped out an electric shaver.  He ran it over his face for a minute or two, then admired the result in a hand-held mirror.  "Whew," I said, "That was a close one.  At least he wasn't using a body groomer."

COAST-TO-COAST ... AT 7TH AND MONTANA!

It was a sad day at 7th and Montana as word spread that David and Kerry are relocating to Florida.  So many people will miss them, especially me, but I think I've come up with a way to keep them up-to-date on the comings and goings at Our Favorite Starbucks.  I've decided to start updating the blog again.  Good luck, David and Kerry ... and if you happen to spot anything unusual at your 'new' Starbucks, let me know! 

THE LICEMAN COMETH ... AT 7TH AND MONTANA!

Eyes were popping at 7th and Montana yesterday as a friendly neighborhood 'mud-slinger' known among insiders as Mr. Lice All made the scene, leaving a trail of dirt and debris in his wake.  He walked through the side entrance and made a beeline for the restroom.  "Shoot," said Genevieve, "I was just about to head in there."  "There's not enough Purell in the Western Hemisphere to encourage me to go in there ... and that's on a good day," I replied.  And so, we cooked-up a plan:  As folks lined-up to use the facilities, Genevieve directed them all to the Fancy Schmancy Café across the street.  I've often wondered whether their business was in the toilet ...