Ladies and Gentlemen, meet "The Guru," a Mysterious Newcomer who arrived on the scene at 7th and Montana this morning, eager to answer Life's Most Perplexing Questions. "It's all quite clear," he said loudly to Anyone Who Would Listen, "The answers you seek, the riddles of life, anything you need ... it all can be found in the annals of "Xena: Warrior Princess" and the lyrics of The Bee Gees." Surprisingly enough, once you get over his striking resemblance to the Ayatollah Khomeini, his arguments make a strange sort of sense. Then, again, maybe he's just Jive Talkin' ... !
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