It was a Banner Day at 7th and Montana today. Actually, it's been a Banner Week. For several days now, the rumor mill has been buzzing at the appearance of a mysterious banner across from Our Favorite Starbucks announcing the "Grand Opening" of Hypoxi. "What's Hypoxi?," asked one onlooker, "Some kind of superglue?" The banner, while somewhat enigmatic, offered a hint. "Design Your Body," it says in small type beneath a prominent Hypoxi logo. I did some digging around and it didn't take long to find out what all the fuss is about. Hypoxi is a Salzburg-based company that offers "targeted body shaping" through a series of patented treatments involving enough high-tech equipment to make the cast of Grey's Anatomy green with envy. My personal favorite is the Vacunaut -- a contraption resembling a cross between an upright vacuum cleaner and a gas pump -- which utilizes compression and vacuum therapy to suction away fat from the abdominal and hip region. "Beauty-conscious Hollywood stars will soon have a new top location in Santa Monica," says the Official Hypoxi Website. In other words, stay tuned, folks. We're in for a barrage of Chunky Celebrities ...!