Ladies and Gentlemen, meet Mommy Warbucks, a German Tourist who made the scene at 7th and Montana this morning with a chip on her shoulder the size of a C-Note. "I just want a cup of coffee," she said, sliding a $100 bill towards Barista Kenisha. "I'm sorry, mam, but do you have anything smaller?," said Kenisha, "We don't have enough change unless you want a lot of five dollar bills." Warbucks sputtered in reply, her voice vaguely reminiscent of Scrooge McDuck. "I walked ten blocks to get here ... and you say you don't have change?!?," she wailed. "Well," explained Kenisha, "We don't have access to anything larger than five and ten dollar bills ... the rest is all locked up." I tried to diffuse the situation. "Well, I guess they don't call it Starbucks for nothing," I said, chuckling, "Your wallet will be brimming with bucks!" This sent Warbucks on the Warpath. She leaned over the counter, peered into the cash register and muttered, "I can see an entire stack of $20's right there ... and you tell me you only have small bills?!?" I don't know what they gave her in the end, but let's hope they slipped her a decaff ...!