A TALE OF THREE STARBUCKS ...!

It was a tale of three Starbucks today as I decided to put the pastry to the test at all three of the Starbucks on Montana. Yes, friends, it’s true, there are three different Starbucks locations in a ten block radius on Montana … and each has its own personality. I started at 7th and Montana. “I’m going to surprise you today,” I told Barista Nada, “Hit me with an Apple Fritter!” She was shocked, but handed me a Fritter nevertheless. I quickly removed it from the store (in order to photograph it in peace), then took a deep breath and bit into it. It was cloyingly sweet, a dense and greasy mass covered in a thick, shimmering layer of sticky icing. My parents had a saying when I was growing up: “In our family we’d eat a sugar coated dreck log if it was put in front of us.” I guess you could say I’ve come a long way because I couldn’t quite bring myself to finish the Fritter. It wasn’t terrible. It was just filling. Besides, I had other fish to fry.

Next up was the Starbucks at Lincoln and Montana, just a block away from 7th Street. Truth be told, this is just a Kiosk in the Pavilions Supermarket, but I still wanted to check it out. “Smile and Say Cheese Danish!,” I called to the Barista as I waived my Spycam in her direction. She didn't laugh. And there weren't any Cheese Danish in her display case, either. I decided to move on.

There’s not a lot you can say about the Starbucks at 14th and Montana. It’s been recently renovated so it fits the Starbucks mold a lot more than Our Favorite Starbucks, but it doesn’t have the same personality or cast of characters. The pastry selection was identical to every other Starbucks I’ve seen in the area and I couldn’t help wondering whether that might be Starbucks' problem. Perhaps in an effort to maintain consistency, Starbucks has standardized its pastry menu whereas others, like Peet’s, pick and choose from a variety of popular local bakeries or contract with local master pastry chefs. Anyhow, I decided – on the advice of the Barista -- to order the Petite Vanilla Bean Scone ($.85). It was Petite, alright … basically just a single bite. But after the Fritter, that’s all I wanted. It wasn’t bad. Not too dry, with just the right touch of Vanilla, but the sugary icing was too much. “Is that all you want?,” asked the Barista, “Usually people order three of those.” “No thanks,” I said, “They say bad things happen in threes!” Speaking of which, I have three slices of Apple Fritter left if anyone's interested ...!