Sunday, October 21, 2007

DR. FARTSWORTH, I PRESUME ...?!?

                             

Ladies and Gentlemen, meet "Dr. Fartsworth," the silent but deadly passenger sitting near me tonight on United Flight #167 from Boston to Los Angeles.  At various intervals during the cross-country flight, Dr. Fartsworth would glance furtively around him before letting loose a fart so pungent that it gave new meaning to the word "flatulent."  "There must be some mistake," I mused as we passed over the Great Lakes.  "The rest of us are heading to LAX but he seems to flying into EX-LAX."  On the other hand, perhaps we were lucky.  With someone like Dr. Fartsworth on board, you know the plane will never run out of gas ...!

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

Now that gave me a giggle, LOL.  Been there, and lived thru it (notice I did not say "done that", lol).  Poor guy, the staff should of offered him some Gas-X with his soda or maybe he should be drinking water.  I heard a new term for his ailment, they call it the "bubble guts".  LOL  Feel sorry for you, that would really add to my nauseum of flying in such close quarters!  Glad you made it home and sorry to hear about the wild fires.  Be safe Marty!

Anonymous said...

Told you to keep a few magic trees in your pocket.Hang a few tround your person, you smell forest fresh, he smells like forest mulch.Take care now, Beckie x

Anonymous said...

Oh Marty! Sorry you had to endure that. I'd barf. Long ago, a friend told me to always bring a little bottle of peppermint essential oil with me on planes and I've done so ever since. (I suppose they would take that away from me now with the new plne rules?) --Cin

Anonymous said...

That is so gross!!  And rude!  I mean, who doesn't have a sneaker every once in a while, but geez, go to the bathroom, and let it rip there.  No class!
xoxo ~Myra

Anonymous said...

Feel sorry for you, but also for him.It is often a condition a person can't help. Just think how embarrassed he must have been. There are a few meds that might help, so I hope he is under a doctors care.  Barb

Anonymous said...

LOL.... oh my.... thanks for  a good laugh!!!

be well,
Dawn
http://journals.aol.com/princesssaurora/CarpeDiem/

Anonymous said...

Marty, that happened to me once, so I just opened the window. Well the rude B****** shot straight passed me and out the window without even saying goodbye!
Gaz ;-)