STUMPING THE GURU ... AT 7TH AND MONTANA!

Shock waves rippled across 7th and Montana yesterday as the Guru -- known for his expertise on all subjects ranging from nuclear physics to the stock market -- was stumped. And I'm pleased to say, I'm the one who stumped him. "I just don't know, just don't know," he said to me, "What do we do with you?" "What do you mean?," I replied. "Well, I've been thinking that this Starbucks is sort of like a theater and everyone has a role ... but I just can't place you." I casually whipped out my Spycam, as if to read my e-mails, and let him go on. "I mean, you're obviously sociable," he continued, "But you're also so ... um ... corporate ..." He trailed off and it was then that I decided to help him out. "I guess there's no role for me around here," I said, "So why don't I just start a blog or something?"