A KOBE BEEF ... AT 7TH AND MONTANA

Soupy Salesman, the local fixture with a taste for tall tales, was up to his old tricks at 7th and Montana this week as he regaled the crowd with tales of his girlfriend. "She stood me up for Kobe Bryant last night," he said, hinting that she and the Lakers giant are an item. I went along with it. "You're kidding," I said. But he was serious. Moments later, his girlfriend -- whose torso is pictured above -- made the scene and seemed a bit surprised to learn about the scandal. "What?!?," she exclaimed, "Me and Kobe?!? ... We were just in the same restaurant, that's all." "Right," said Soupy, trying to salvage the situation, "But you had dinner with him." "He was sitting in the same restaurant and I said hello," she said, flatly. Soupy's story was unraveling faster than you can say double dribble. By the time the two lovebirds left, I couldn't help wondering whether she'd take a free-throw.