LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, IN PREPARATION FOR LANDING, PLEASE MAKE SURE YOUR PROJECTILE VOMIT IS STORED SAFELY IN THE OVERHEAD COMPARTMENT ...!

Ladies and Gentlemen, meet "Luke," my seatmate on United Flight #959 today to Chicago. Luke didn't say much -- which was fine by me -- but what he did say sort of hung in the air like a miasma. "Do you mind if I leave this here?," he asked. It was a Barf Bag. He smiled at me and placed it snugly on the armrest between our seats. The bag was empty, thank God, but his intentions were clear: He expected to be using it shortly and wanted to keep it within easy reach. Would Luke puke? That was the question that haunted me for the duration of the nine-hour flight. Every so often I'd steal a look at the bag, then at Luke who, surprisingly enough, seemed to be enjoying the flight immensely. He ate a heavy meal, belched loudly, and nodded off to sleep. Who knows ... maybe the whole thing was just a Gag!