Ladies and gentlemen, meet "Craptilla," an Anonymous Local who -- together with her One-Eyed Pug -- caused a commotion this morning at 7th and Montana. There I was, minding my own business, walking behind them on 7th Street, when the One-Eyed Pug decided to do its business near the sidewalk. "Craptilla" glanced suspiciously in my direction, then crouched as if to clean-up the mess. I continued watching out of the corner of my eye and, sure enough, as soon as I passed by, Craptilla said "Come on, honey," and pulled her dog away, leaving a steaming load of dog feces in her wake. I whipped out my Spycam and followed them into the Starbucks parking lot. Pointing the camera in her direction, I pretended to make a phone call. "Hey, Poopsie," I yelled into the phone, "You forgot something!" Craptilla beat a hasty retreat and I made a bee-line for the evidence she left behind. I'm telling you, some people have no sense of doody ...!