Quick, call Pokey, the Octogenarian Security Guard at 7th and Montana! A crime so heinous has taken place at Our Favorite Starbucks that news of it reached me clear across the Atlantic. It seems that an Anonymous Evildoer has pelted Julie, Assistant Manager Extraordinaire, with a Chocolate Cupcake. Who could sink so low? The list of suspects is as long as the line at Starbucks during the morning rush. While the nature of the crime has led some to suspect the Jittery Nutcase, local authorities have already ruled him out as a suspect. "The Nutcase specializes in throwing Hot Chocolate," said a source close to the situation, "Cupcakes aren't his style." Rumor has it this may have been an "inside job." As for me, I'm rushing home to launch an investigation of my own!