A LITTLE SPICE ... AT 7TH AND MONTANA

They say that variety is the spice of life, but a bold newcomer spiced things up just a bit too much for my taste yesterday at 7th and Montana. “Howdy,” he said, introducing himself, “I’m a Food Engineer.” “Ah,” I replied, “You’re one of those people who modify foods to create a better tomorrow?” “Yes,” he replied. Visions of Killer Tomatoes and Mutant Cucumbers danced in my head. He went on and on, turning his attention to Robb and Robin, while I quietly inched my way up 7th Street. This morning, when I saw Robb and Robin, they gave me the full scoop. “Would you believe we spoke with that guy for more than twenty minutes,” Robb said, “He’s really nice … he even gave us some special spices.” I was shocked. Not only did he give them a collection of his own, private blend of spices, but Robb and Robin actually sprinkled one of them, an enigmatic mixture called something like Rosemary Surprise, on their dinner. “Let me get this straight,” I said, “You accepted a bunch of unknown spices from a Food Engineer and sprinkled one of them on your dinner?!? How are you feeling?” “Well, now that you mention it, I did sleep more deeply than usual last night,” said Robin. If you ask me, a Rosemary by any other name doesn't necessarily smell as sweet ...!