- The man-in-question was evidently homeless. His identity has not yet been released;
- Police discovered him late last night, very much alive, loitering around Starbucks. They asked him to leave;
- The death was discovered at approximately 11:30 this morning by a Mysterious Newcomer, known among insiders as "The Loon" for his tendency to honk like a Canadian Goose at bicyclists and skateboarders;
- "The Loon" (pictured below) brought the corpse to the attention of workers at the nearby Montana West Hair Salon, prompting one Brave Hair Stylist to hold a mirror in front of the man's mouth to see if he was breathing. He wasn't;
- The Hair Stylist called the police at approximately 11:45; They responded within minutes.
- The Coroner -- a woman in her mid-thirties -- arrived approximately 30-minutes later to investigate; She removed the body at precisely 1:04 p.m.
- Inside sources report that "The Loon" claims he knew the deceased and that the man had only just been released from a nearby hospital after suffering from a serious ailment.
If you ask me, this last bit of information is the most tragic. If true, it suggests that health care practitioners quite possibly turned a homeless man out on the street yesterday to die. That he died at the Bus Stop at 7th and Montana, in full view of the Hoi Palloi at Our Favorite Starbucks, is the Ultimate Indignity.