AN OPERA CRUISE, 7TH AND MONTANA STYLE ...!

Light finally dawned at 7th and Montana this morning as I figured out what Rigolatte -- the Local Loon known for locking himself in the men's room at Our Favorite Starbucks and belting out Opera tunes -- has been up to. Two weeks ago, he took me aside and asked me a rather unusual question. "What's a Cubit?," he asked, "I must know what a Cubit is!" "It's an ancient unit of measurement," I replied, "Noah's Ark was measured in cubits." "I already know all that!," he barked, "But how big is a cubit?" His eyes were blazing, his hands were twitching and he looked just about ready to break out into song. I fled the scene. Today, two weeks later, he re-appeared, this time with a different question. "What religion are you?," he asked, "Catholic or Christian?" He appeared to be holding a checklist. "Neither," I replied. "Aha," he said, moving on to the next table. He asked the people sitting next to me whether they were familiar with the Book of Genesis. For the record, a cubit was roughly equivalent to 18 inches. According to Genesis, Noah's Ark was 300 cubits long by 50 cubits wide and 30 cubits high. That's more than enough to hold Rigolatte and his entire collection of Opera CDs. And that's when it struck me: Rigolatte has been busy with a project of Biblical Proportions. I was about to confront him with my suspicions -- and request a cabin in First Class -- but I was too late. He was already busy cackling up a storm and doing pirouettes down the center of 7th Street ...!