Ladies and Gentlemen, meet Madam Bowser, a local animal lover with a PETA Principle all her own: She delights in talking "baby talk" to strange dogs and sticking her hands in their faces. This morning, Madam Bowser met her match in the form of Susie, a less-than-adorable German Shephard who hangs out at 7th and Montana. "Ooooh," she cooed, reaching for Susie's face, "Look at the cutesy wootsey doggie!" Susie snapped and lunged in what appeared to be an understandable effort to rip out Madam Bowser's vocal chords. Thank God Susie's owner, John, sprang into immediate action to prevent a catastrophe. "Please, don't take it personally," he explained, "Susie is protective and doesn't like people rushing up to her like that." Personally, I think he was wasting his breath. Anyone who would go poking their hands into a strange dog's face -- without even asking whether the dog is friendly -- must be Barking Mad ...!