ANOTHER OPERA LOON ... AT LINCOLN AND MONTANA!

Competition reared its ugly head at Lincoln and Montana last night as not one but two Opera Loons made the scene at the same time. There I was, minding my own business in the Pavilions Parking Lot, when I stumbled across a brand new Opera Loon (above right, in the distance, wearing a blue shirt). He was singing an aria of his own creation and the words went something like this: "Lower my taxes ... Oh Lordy they're high ... Lower my taxes they're high as the sky ...!" A Pavilions employee (above right, in the distance, wearing a black shirt) asked him to leave. But that was nothing compared to the reaction from Rigolatte, the man known for locking himself in the men's room at Our Favorite Starbucks and belting out Opera Tunes for hours on end. Call it fate, but Rigolatte happened to be walking by just as his 'competition' was reaching a crescendo. I egged him on. "Hey, why don't you join him in a duet?," I asked. Rigolatte just looked at me and snarled, "I don't need to stoop to his level." His response couldn't have been cattier if he were singing a rousing chorus of "Oh Solo Meowwww ...!"