Politics reared its Ugly Head this morning at 7th and Montana as Screenwriter Nat reminded me of my status as "Unofficial Mayor" of Starbucks and hinted that I should be campaigning for re-election. "Tell me," he said, channeling Jim Lehrer, "Are you a Maverick?" "You betcha," I lied, "I'm a Doggone Maverick!" Moments later, as if to prove my point, I fended off a Political Attack from Our Favorite City Councilman, who accused me of cheating on the Sunday Crossword Puzzle. Of course, there's more to campaigning than simply lying and fending off misleading attacks. You have to be nice, too. That's why, when our Friendly Neighborhood Antagonist (pictured above) made the scene, I violently agreed with everything he said. "I'm telling you," he began, "I just watched the Gold Diggers DVD and it's the most hysterical thing I've ever seen. It was so funny that I practically had to tape my mouth shut to keep my guts from popping out!" I smiled and nodded my head in agreement, despite reviews calling the film "overwhelmingly unfunny" and "moronic." Stay tuned tomorrow as I kiss every Ugly Baby in town and wolf down a plate of Apple Fritters ...!